I don't know how it is raising boys but with girls, well, there are days that I can feel their future teen years breathing down my neck. It resembles the approaching sound of thundering paciderms or a runaway locomotive. Today is one of those days.
There are a few things in motherhood I consider highly under-rated, one of which is dressing my children. I really feel like each morning, when I go into their closets, it's like I am 8 all over again, dragging that worn case of Barbie clothes out and lovingly searching through the small piles to find just the right thing for my dolls to wear for the day. A few months ago, I realized that Hannah, especially, would much prefer to do the selecting on her own. Sad Mommy milestone. Reluctantly, I have relented (difficult as I am --some might say-- a control freak). Today her chosen ensemble was an army green skirt with a flouncy hem, a lavendar blouse with butterflies on it, bright purple leggings, and blue flip flops. (YOU SEE? THIS IS WHY I NEED TO DO EVERYTHING MYSELF!!! REALLY, IT IS NOT A CONTROL PROBLEM!). The blouse also has a cute flouncy hem and elastic in the waist but she tucked it in to her skirt. To me, this looked ridiculous so I kindly suggested she untuck it. Torrents of tears and protests later, beleagured from WARdrobe woes, I finally say, "Hannah, just trust me. It looks better hanging out than tucked in." To which she responds, "I want to look like a princess. I don't want to look like a big Mommy!"
I. Don't. Want. To. Look. Like. Mommy. BIG. MOMMY.
Ouch.
Good luck with that one, my clone.
I think I am going to look at my "World's prettiest Mommy" mirror that she made me last week in Sunday school until I feel better. Lol.
Showing posts with label hannah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hannah. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
How God Works; Memorial Day 2010
Memorial Day has always been special to me, having a Grandfather and Uncle who served in WWII. Four years ago, Memorial Day took on a rather sad meaning for us when Daniel's father passed away from esophageal cancer in the wee hours of Memorial Day 2005. Memorial Day 2010, however, will have a most special meaning in my heart because that is the day my firstborn gave her life to Christ.
Hard to know where to start telling this story. Hannah's birth brought on some health issues for me and a radical shift in perspective to the point that I quit a job I was basically addicted to. Soon after, Daniel's father fought a six month battle with cancer, and passed away. All those events converged on our family and my marriage and my spiritual life in a way I really can't put into words. We were never the same. Praise God, we were never the same. I began to walk with Christ in a more intimate, surrendered manner than before and sometime along that year I began to pray that Hannah would come to know God at an early age and never depart from a serious pursuit of Him all her life. Like always, I prayed in the smallness of my faith and He answered in the overwhelming greatness of who He is. I had hoped "early in life" might mean before the age of 10. God had different plans.
Hannah has always enjoyed stories from the Bible. We started praying with her when she was 2. Her Daddy showed her how to kneel by her bed, clasp her hands, and pray, and she enjoyed doing so. However, sometime between 3 and 4 she began to resist family prayer time. It would be her turn and she would say, "I don't want to pray." This broke my heart and I didn't know how to proceed other than telling her I looked forward to hearing her prayers again. Often we would give her something to repeat and she would participate half-heartedly. I sensed a hardness in her that is hard to describe. In the meantime, my friend Jo Ellen began inviting us to BSF which has fabulous children's programs. I was hesitant to start on yet another Bible study venture or take them to another church building but we tried it out. The children, even in the 2's and under program, are instructed to lay down on a towel and spend quiet time with God. This lasts for ten minutes each week at BSF. Well, the first week went okay but when we came back for the second week, Hannah said, "I don't want to go to BSF. I don't like to talk to God." Well, I calmly (despite wanting to cry and rant) said, "You know, I'd rather talk to God than anyone, Hannah, and I hope that you feel that way soon because He is my favorite."
As Hannah has stayed the course in BSF where she is taught accurate Bible stories chronologically from the book of John, she has fallen in love with Jesus. She has a suprising grasp of basic theologicacl concepts which we reinforce at home through daily Bible stories. So one day we were riding in the car and she said,
"Does the Holy Spirit live inside me?"
"Well," I answered, "He lives inside those of us who have asked Jesus to be our saviour."
"What is a saviour?"
"Someone who saves us from our bad choices and makes a way for us to be with God forever."
"I want that. I want Jesus for MY savior, to help me not make bad choices, and to go to Heaven with Him, and I want to be baptized."
Well, I about had to pull off the road. I was not prepared for this at the age of 4!
The following week at BSF, I spoke to Kim W, our awesome former children's pastor, and she encouraged me to continue talking to Hannah. We left the sanctuary to go downstairs and get the children. The home training lesson was handed to me, and I looked down at the title, "How to lead your child to Christ." I already had tears in my eyes. Her teacher then pulled me aside, "You need to read this," she said. "Hannah is asking all the right questions. You need to be ready." I began to realize that with all Hannah was at the age of 4, she wanted all of Jesus. Sure, she thinks "sin" is Spanish for "bad choices" and she still makes plenty of them but she is aware of her sin and desires a savior. Over the next week, she told me multiple times that she was ready. In the car on the way home from Alabama on Mother's Day, we asked her to bless the Wendy's we were about to inhale and she said, "Thank you for this chicken and Jesus I would like to ask you to be my savior." Boom.
Since this was not the full confession of sin, desire to repent, and life surrender prayer I believed she needed to pray we knew we needed to follow up. It is with joy that I write that when this time came, I had ultimate confidence in my husband to spiritually discern this situation and lead Hannah in the way she should go. I took Emily shopping and he took Hannah on a date. A couple of hours passed, and when I came in the house they were quietly reading a book. I went to the kitchen to put some things away and I heard her come up behind me. "Mommy," she said, "I have Jesus in my heart." I turned around to look at her and what I saw physically affected me. She looked radiant and peaceful in a way I have not seen and she ran into my arms and threw all of herself around me in the best hug. If I drew this story out or included too much information for some of you, I'm sorry, but that moment blew me away. I don't want to forget any of it.
After she left, I called Daniel into the kitchen and covered his shirt in mascara. Then he retold me some of the conversation. What struck me is that even as ready as she was, when he brought it up again there was resistance there. Even at the age of 4 there was a war for Hannah's soul. "I don't want to talk about that now," she said. So he waited and she said, "Well Daddy, maybe I do want to talk about it. About Jesus being in my heart." Why do we resist a love that is so encompassing and so radical and so thorough?
Thanks for hanging in there and reading this story. Hope you have one, too. There is nothing like knowing He is yours and you are His. Forever.
Hard to know where to start telling this story. Hannah's birth brought on some health issues for me and a radical shift in perspective to the point that I quit a job I was basically addicted to. Soon after, Daniel's father fought a six month battle with cancer, and passed away. All those events converged on our family and my marriage and my spiritual life in a way I really can't put into words. We were never the same. Praise God, we were never the same. I began to walk with Christ in a more intimate, surrendered manner than before and sometime along that year I began to pray that Hannah would come to know God at an early age and never depart from a serious pursuit of Him all her life. Like always, I prayed in the smallness of my faith and He answered in the overwhelming greatness of who He is. I had hoped "early in life" might mean before the age of 10. God had different plans.
Hannah has always enjoyed stories from the Bible. We started praying with her when she was 2. Her Daddy showed her how to kneel by her bed, clasp her hands, and pray, and she enjoyed doing so. However, sometime between 3 and 4 she began to resist family prayer time. It would be her turn and she would say, "I don't want to pray." This broke my heart and I didn't know how to proceed other than telling her I looked forward to hearing her prayers again. Often we would give her something to repeat and she would participate half-heartedly. I sensed a hardness in her that is hard to describe. In the meantime, my friend Jo Ellen began inviting us to BSF which has fabulous children's programs. I was hesitant to start on yet another Bible study venture or take them to another church building but we tried it out. The children, even in the 2's and under program, are instructed to lay down on a towel and spend quiet time with God. This lasts for ten minutes each week at BSF. Well, the first week went okay but when we came back for the second week, Hannah said, "I don't want to go to BSF. I don't like to talk to God." Well, I calmly (despite wanting to cry and rant) said, "You know, I'd rather talk to God than anyone, Hannah, and I hope that you feel that way soon because He is my favorite."
As Hannah has stayed the course in BSF where she is taught accurate Bible stories chronologically from the book of John, she has fallen in love with Jesus. She has a suprising grasp of basic theologicacl concepts which we reinforce at home through daily Bible stories. So one day we were riding in the car and she said,
"Does the Holy Spirit live inside me?"
"Well," I answered, "He lives inside those of us who have asked Jesus to be our saviour."
"What is a saviour?"
"Someone who saves us from our bad choices and makes a way for us to be with God forever."
"I want that. I want Jesus for MY savior, to help me not make bad choices, and to go to Heaven with Him, and I want to be baptized."
Well, I about had to pull off the road. I was not prepared for this at the age of 4!
The following week at BSF, I spoke to Kim W, our awesome former children's pastor, and she encouraged me to continue talking to Hannah. We left the sanctuary to go downstairs and get the children. The home training lesson was handed to me, and I looked down at the title, "How to lead your child to Christ." I already had tears in my eyes. Her teacher then pulled me aside, "You need to read this," she said. "Hannah is asking all the right questions. You need to be ready." I began to realize that with all Hannah was at the age of 4, she wanted all of Jesus. Sure, she thinks "sin" is Spanish for "bad choices" and she still makes plenty of them but she is aware of her sin and desires a savior. Over the next week, she told me multiple times that she was ready. In the car on the way home from Alabama on Mother's Day, we asked her to bless the Wendy's we were about to inhale and she said, "Thank you for this chicken and Jesus I would like to ask you to be my savior." Boom.
Since this was not the full confession of sin, desire to repent, and life surrender prayer I believed she needed to pray we knew we needed to follow up. It is with joy that I write that when this time came, I had ultimate confidence in my husband to spiritually discern this situation and lead Hannah in the way she should go. I took Emily shopping and he took Hannah on a date. A couple of hours passed, and when I came in the house they were quietly reading a book. I went to the kitchen to put some things away and I heard her come up behind me. "Mommy," she said, "I have Jesus in my heart." I turned around to look at her and what I saw physically affected me. She looked radiant and peaceful in a way I have not seen and she ran into my arms and threw all of herself around me in the best hug. If I drew this story out or included too much information for some of you, I'm sorry, but that moment blew me away. I don't want to forget any of it.
After she left, I called Daniel into the kitchen and covered his shirt in mascara. Then he retold me some of the conversation. What struck me is that even as ready as she was, when he brought it up again there was resistance there. Even at the age of 4 there was a war for Hannah's soul. "I don't want to talk about that now," she said. So he waited and she said, "Well Daddy, maybe I do want to talk about it. About Jesus being in my heart." Why do we resist a love that is so encompassing and so radical and so thorough?
Thanks for hanging in there and reading this story. Hope you have one, too. There is nothing like knowing He is yours and you are His. Forever.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Spring
I changed the girls' clothes out this morning and came up with this list rather quickly.
TOP 5 THINGS I DISLIKE ABOUT CHANGING DRAWERS/CLOSETS OUT FOR THE SEASONS:
5. It takes forever.
4. My children, well, let's say they are not content to play quietly and let me get the job done.
3. It never really ends. There's always that load of laundry you pull out right after you move everything over so you have to hall the storage boxes back out. Not to mention April cold snaps. Huh.
2. It's tedious. Should I hang all the skirts together? Will this still fit this year or not? Etc, etc.
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON I DISLIKE SWAPPING OUT LAST SEASON'S CLOTHING:
1. It is such a tangible/visual reminder of how quickly my babies are becoming women. There. I've said it. Every time I put a shirt or pair of pants away knowing the little person who wore it would never be that little again...ouch!
On a lighter note, I was pulling out the large, under-the-bed storage totes today and Hannah, age 4, was watching me closely. And then, no lie, she looked me straight in the face and said,
"Mom, have you ever tried the 'shoes under'?"
Wait, was my 4 year old really quoting an infomercial to me?
"What did you say?"
"The shoes under" she said, as if I was really slow on this one. "It's a special package for holding your shoes. Fits right under the bed. Works great. I saw it on television."
Oh, yes. My very own Jack Lalanne/Billy Mays. I got a good laugh out of that one.
TOP 5 THINGS I DISLIKE ABOUT CHANGING DRAWERS/CLOSETS OUT FOR THE SEASONS:
5. It takes forever.
4. My children, well, let's say they are not content to play quietly and let me get the job done.
3. It never really ends. There's always that load of laundry you pull out right after you move everything over so you have to hall the storage boxes back out. Not to mention April cold snaps. Huh.
2. It's tedious. Should I hang all the skirts together? Will this still fit this year or not? Etc, etc.
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON I DISLIKE SWAPPING OUT LAST SEASON'S CLOTHING:
1. It is such a tangible/visual reminder of how quickly my babies are becoming women. There. I've said it. Every time I put a shirt or pair of pants away knowing the little person who wore it would never be that little again...ouch!
On a lighter note, I was pulling out the large, under-the-bed storage totes today and Hannah, age 4, was watching me closely. And then, no lie, she looked me straight in the face and said,
"Mom, have you ever tried the 'shoes under'?"
Wait, was my 4 year old really quoting an infomercial to me?
"What did you say?"
"The shoes under" she said, as if I was really slow on this one. "It's a special package for holding your shoes. Fits right under the bed. Works great. I saw it on television."
Oh, yes. My very own Jack Lalanne/Billy Mays. I got a good laugh out of that one.
Monday, November 2, 2009
Love it
Love doing doctrinal drill with a 4 year old.
Me: Hannah, when will God die?
Hannah: Never.
Me: Hannah, when was God born?
Hannah: Never.
Me: That's right. He always was. He will always be. Our God is the one true God. How many persons?
Hannah: shows three fingers
Me: And who are they?
Hannah: Father, Son, and Moon
Me: Hannah, when will God die?
Hannah: Never.
Me: Hannah, when was God born?
Hannah: Never.
Me: That's right. He always was. He will always be. Our God is the one true God. How many persons?
Hannah: shows three fingers
Me: And who are they?
Hannah: Father, Son, and Moon
Monday, October 12, 2009
The Sunrise
I thought teaching a child to read would be different than it's been with Hannah so far. I pictured a lightning bolt experience. A sudden "ah ha!" moment. Afterall, most milestones are that way, right? Maybe that's why I was afraid I might miss it. I missed her first word (daycare) and her first crawl (church nursery). I don't like missing things when it comes to my firstborn. So I have been over vigilant about the reading process. I have realized, though, that her journey to reading has been more like a slow sunrise than a fast moving thunderstorm. I have been here for all of it, soaking it up, watching the rays of light stretch across the horizon of her mind. It's been awesome.
And funny. Friday she was staring blankly at the Pringles can. After a while, she looked up with this confident smile and said, "Mommy! I know what his name is!" I wondered what in the world she was talking about and how I, a child of the 80's had somehow missed Mr. Pringle's first name. "Og!" she shouted. Og? Really, okay. Then I saw it. There was a symbol, lower left hand corner of the can stating that there were zero grams of transfats in this can. Og. Well, I didn't have the heart to tell her differently so if you come to our house and are offered some of Og's chips, please play along.
And funny. Friday she was staring blankly at the Pringles can. After a while, she looked up with this confident smile and said, "Mommy! I know what his name is!" I wondered what in the world she was talking about and how I, a child of the 80's had somehow missed Mr. Pringle's first name. "Og!" she shouted. Og? Really, okay. Then I saw it. There was a symbol, lower left hand corner of the can stating that there were zero grams of transfats in this can. Og. Well, I didn't have the heart to tell her differently so if you come to our house and are offered some of Og's chips, please play along.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Wrapping Up a Week
Well, the hard drive crashed on Tuesday so I am just now blogging despite what has been a very eventful week.
First, Wednesday was Emily's very first big girl day with NO accidents. Mama is very proud. One tiny accident today but we were in our swim suit and standing in a puddle of pool water anyway so Mama just "didn't see that." Sorry, fellow residents.
Second, I am very proud of my oldest this week because she jumped into VBS with both feet. Not big on change in routine, crowds, or loud noise/movies, I was afraid VBS might be all wrong for her. I was wrong! Hannah loved every minute of it. We have already shed some tears over today being the last day. She thinks Ms. Joye and Ms. Julie (our VBS divas) are movie stars. She reportedly loved puppets, music, dancing, and Bible stories. I loved not having to even think about supper all week and Hannah loved that "You know Mommy, if you don't like your supper it's okay not to eat it because they have good snack at Bible school." We also had a good cry in the car on the way today because Mimi didn't get to do "real" Bible school this year, just went to the nursery. That really hurt Hannah's heart because she knows how much Mimi loves to dance and sing and afterall, we'd all been practicing the music in the car together. Next year's VBS just seems too far away! When our pastor spoke today about hearing God's call and jumping in with both feet, I prayed that Hannah would keep this attitude for the rest of her life! Thanks to those who worked so hard to make this happen!
First, Wednesday was Emily's very first big girl day with NO accidents. Mama is very proud. One tiny accident today but we were in our swim suit and standing in a puddle of pool water anyway so Mama just "didn't see that." Sorry, fellow residents.
Second, I am very proud of my oldest this week because she jumped into VBS with both feet. Not big on change in routine, crowds, or loud noise/movies, I was afraid VBS might be all wrong for her. I was wrong! Hannah loved every minute of it. We have already shed some tears over today being the last day. She thinks Ms. Joye and Ms. Julie (our VBS divas) are movie stars. She reportedly loved puppets, music, dancing, and Bible stories. I loved not having to even think about supper all week and Hannah loved that "You know Mommy, if you don't like your supper it's okay not to eat it because they have good snack at Bible school." We also had a good cry in the car on the way today because Mimi didn't get to do "real" Bible school this year, just went to the nursery. That really hurt Hannah's heart because she knows how much Mimi loves to dance and sing and afterall, we'd all been practicing the music in the car together. Next year's VBS just seems too far away! When our pastor spoke today about hearing God's call and jumping in with both feet, I prayed that Hannah would keep this attitude for the rest of her life! Thanks to those who worked so hard to make this happen!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Daddy Time
I realized there are no pics of my handsome hubby on the blog to date. This is just negligence on my part and I need to fix it. Hannah and I took a quick trip to the library last night to grab a couple of books and pick up a movie. When we came home, it was time to snuggle with Daddy. This is most definitely his love language and hers too. Apparently she was cold and this robe is big enough for both of the skinnies in our family!
Reminds me of days gone by:
Friday, December 12, 2008
Creating a Monster
Sorry I always sound a little corny on this blog but if I don't type the cute things my kids say here they evaporate!
I got Hannah all dressed this morning, mind you in a l/s t-shirt and sweat pants. She goes to the mirror (also known as our tv) and studies herself.
"Mommy, do I look beautiful?" she asks. Before I have a chance to answer she says, "Gorgeous. White shirt, black pants--that is gorgeous," and off she went to play with toys.
Later, we spilled milk twice on the white shirt and I promised to let her change. "But if I take off my white shirt, will I still be gorgeous?" she asks.
"Always," I said. :)
I got Hannah all dressed this morning, mind you in a l/s t-shirt and sweat pants. She goes to the mirror (also known as our tv) and studies herself.
"Mommy, do I look beautiful?" she asks. Before I have a chance to answer she says, "Gorgeous. White shirt, black pants--that is gorgeous," and off she went to play with toys.
Later, we spilled milk twice on the white shirt and I promised to let her change. "But if I take off my white shirt, will I still be gorgeous?" she asks.
"Always," I said. :)
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Birthdays
Yesterday was my birthday and it was so fun to watch Hannah celebrate. Here are my two favorite conversations:
Me: Hannah, I saw your friend Casey (our babysitter) today. She's coming to play with you on Tuesday.
Hannah: First we have to eat our cake on Tuesday.
Me (smiling): Oh, are we eating cake on Tuesday?
Hannah: blank stare
Me (laughing): Did Daddy say we're going to have cake on Tuesday?
Hannah (softly): We're not supposed to talk about it.
Then, yesterday morning I woke up and Daniel said he and Hannah would go pick up breakfast. He threw on a sweatshirt and said it was okay for Hannah to wear her pajamas. As he was gathering a few things, Hannah came into my room and I put her coat on.
Me: Have fun with Daddy.
Hannah: It's okay if I have on just my 'jamas.
Me: Oh, yeah, that's fine if Daddy says it's okay.
Hannah: I'm just going to sit in the car while we get the doughnuts.
Daniel (from the other room): Hannah! Come in here and stop telling Mommy the secrets!
Me: Hannah, I saw your friend Casey (our babysitter) today. She's coming to play with you on Tuesday.
Hannah: First we have to eat our cake on Tuesday.
Me (smiling): Oh, are we eating cake on Tuesday?
Hannah: blank stare
Me (laughing): Did Daddy say we're going to have cake on Tuesday?
Hannah (softly): We're not supposed to talk about it.
Then, yesterday morning I woke up and Daniel said he and Hannah would go pick up breakfast. He threw on a sweatshirt and said it was okay for Hannah to wear her pajamas. As he was gathering a few things, Hannah came into my room and I put her coat on.
Me: Have fun with Daddy.
Hannah: It's okay if I have on just my 'jamas.
Me: Oh, yeah, that's fine if Daddy says it's okay.
Hannah: I'm just going to sit in the car while we get the doughnuts.
Daniel (from the other room): Hannah! Come in here and stop telling Mommy the secrets!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Teenage Treasure Box
I've decided to store some things away in a treasure box for later when Hannah and Emily are teenagers. This way, when they are whining for cell phones, in love with teenage boys, and completely disenchanted with me I can whip a few of these out for comfort. :)
Last week, we went to Publix and rode around in one of the big car-style grocery carts. (Let me just insert a shout-out to stores that have carts that accomodate more than one child). Emily was grumpy and tired so she just leaned her head over and laid on Hannah's shoulder for about fifteen minutes. Hannah LOVED it. And the whole time we were in the store, Hannah was singing, "I like my Mommy. I like my Mommy. I like my Mommy."
Yesterday we had a lounge around day so we could recover Hannah from sinus/allergy stuff. We were snuggling under the covers and watching PBS before Emily woke up. She looked over at me, smiled, and said, "Mommy, your my best friend. I could snuggle you all the days."
Aww!
Last week, we went to Publix and rode around in one of the big car-style grocery carts. (Let me just insert a shout-out to stores that have carts that accomodate more than one child). Emily was grumpy and tired so she just leaned her head over and laid on Hannah's shoulder for about fifteen minutes. Hannah LOVED it. And the whole time we were in the store, Hannah was singing, "I like my Mommy. I like my Mommy. I like my Mommy."
Yesterday we had a lounge around day so we could recover Hannah from sinus/allergy stuff. We were snuggling under the covers and watching PBS before Emily woke up. She looked over at me, smiled, and said, "Mommy, your my best friend. I could snuggle you all the days."
Aww!
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